Meta

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

mmmmm peaches...



Its been a long time, I shouldn't have left you. last week, a mighty wind bloweth a large deck chair from the top floor patio of my house onto the hood of my car. It[deck chair] left one dent on the hood and a teeny dent on the panel above the driver side front wheel. I went to ICBC last friday to do a claim and what a dickhead I am, the guy accidentally gave me 300 bucks extra on the cost but here I am asking how I go about this and that and he spotted his mistake and tore it up. I dont really care too much about these dents, they are small, I just wanted to see what kinda options are available to me. I found out that you get 2 years to do the work when ICBC give you a claim, maybe I can budget a fresh coat of paint outta this.

Years ago I saw Margaret Cho doing some stand up in Vancouver. She spoke about how she loves to watch pornos and have sex, cause its like eating while watching the cooking channel. A while ago friend of mine sent me a link to this interesting interview with a man named Frederick Kaufman. The interview is about the relationship between Food TV and Porn. They are shot in similar ways and in a way offer similar types of experiences to their audience. I found this interesting cause I watch the food network and lots of people I know also watch it.. and for the most part, most of us don't really cook.

Basically, Emeril made it OK for men to watch Food TV, So now that its OK, what should we do, introduce some characters that appeal to men. Rachel Ray, is the "girl next door". Giada, is this "sexy girl", whos always in outfits that show off her body even with the camera's additional ten pounds. There's Tyler, who goes to these houses where a wife needs help with dinner, (in the porno world, hes the plumber/delivery guy). Iron chef is supposed to fill some S&M desire.

you may not see how this is affecting your porn senses, well, for one they are for the most part selling a lie, in a porn, the action scenes are made to look kinda easy, on Food TV they show someone cooking something thats really quite complicated, but making it look simple. Porn stars have fluffers to keep the scene interesting and on food TV if you see one cake, but seven were baked and this is the nicest.

The production also has its similarities, the overdone sound effects, the repetative camera cuts, food, girl, food, girl, etc. Looking at some peaches or a steak maybe not be as interesting without this porn-effect.

here's some websites for your viewing:

http://www.whitehouse.org/

http://maddox.xmission.com/


Here's a chat between 4 grown men about the title of a review blog.

FiSHBoY: thepenismightier.blogspot
BFP: nice
Robotanist: laaaaaaaaame
Robotanist: WE"RE NOT USING PENS!
BFP: and unavailable
Robotanist: internewt isn't even avail
metamator: how about "cragg giggling like a school girl"
Robotanist: now we's talking!
Robotanist: snausages
Robotanist: damn. gone
metamator: devilinabluedress
Robotanist:cragginabluedress
metamator: nowweretalking
Robotanist: http://nowweretalking.blogspot.com
Check Availability
This blog address is available.
metamator: meh
BFP: that's my second favorite
metamator: BFP1138
metamator: madgrundles
Robotanist: grundletron
FiSHBoY: grundlestiltsken
Robotanist: Miss Grundle and Mr Weatherbee
FiSHBoY: grundle in the jungle
metamator: grundle dental dam
metamator: thats good cragg
Robotanist: yeah it is
BFP: what is a grundle?

Lyrics of a song in my head today:
Artist: Tegan and Sara
Album: Under feet like ours
Track: This is everything

climbed up on the rainbow
just to see if I’d fall off
I’m a frosted lemon coward
and I don’t know how
No, I don't know how to hold you
without shaking
no I’m not aware of how
I could possibly love you
without aching
yes I give you everything
yes I give you anything
I gave you everything
gotta watch myself
I’ve gotta love myself
and take care
and so keep the light on before
ya hop into bed
cos, baby, this is the last
honest look I’ll ever give

2 Comments:

At 10:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hello meta,
i'm glad you featured that de laurentis girl on your page in regards to the connection between food and porn.
the first time i saw her show my first reaction (and i have witnesses) was: "how did she get this job? ...she must be sleeping with the producer". harsh. i know. and i'm sure she's a lovely lady so excuse the hyberbole.
i totally agree with you though; there's something totally sexy going on when she cooks and she hams it up to the camera cooing and making suggestive sounds.
as a side note, i've tried her recipes and they suck.

 
At 11:49 AM, Blogger metamator said...

My wife and I were saying the same thing about Giada, and who do "I" have to sleep with to get a cooking show around here? look at that book, should come complete with a centerfold fold out.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home